The 2025 Clarksville Area Kayak Fishing Group tournament trail started off with a solid second place finish. Then by the second tournament I was headed for a repeat of the last several years when I found myself in twenty fourth place. Had it been 24 out of 100, I would have cheered; but it was out of 27.
It had been quite some time since there had been a desire to win – I did ok (got lucky) from time to time, but just wasn’t feelin’ it anymore. As my wife Joy had (repeatedly) said to me a few years back, “your fishing has lost its soul”. I clearly understood what she meant, that I had lost the reasons that I loved it, but did nothing to change me year after year.
I would sign up for tournaments, then at some point regret the decision and wish I was doing anything else. I often left the water early, or just found myself wandering from one spot to another with no focus…no plan…just chillin’ on the water. After the twenty fourth place finish, I asked myself if I really wanted to be doing this…then I asked myself why I was doing it in the first place. It had already became a topic at check ins – “I thought you quit” again.
There I found myself, after another crushing defeat, in the garage staring at the shelves of baits; the rods, the reels, the kayaks; all the stuff I had acquired. I began to open all of the tackle boxes, emptying them one by one. Then cleared the shelves and went through everything – looking for something, nothing in particular, but something. I set it all out in front of me.
I pulled up a chair, staring at it all, and had an honest conversation with myself. Again, asking the same two questions:
Do I even want to be doing this; do I even care?
Why am I doing this at all?
The second is easier, and I have always known the reasons why. I love fishing, but I love the people I have met along the way even more. I truly, truly do. They have become a second family. Everyone from the farthest points away to across town, those who I may have only met in passing to the ones I fish with on a regular basis, those I have shared housing with at tournaments or those I just shared water with; each and every one…well, almost all – there are always a couple. But that is why I continued, even when I no longer had the desire to be competitive; the people make me smile. Another thing my Joy pointed out to me, I do get some energy from being around others.
As I sorted through boxes of baits (many unopened), I began segregating them into favorites versus those I had because I “should fish with them, that’s what someone said”. The favorites, occupied a much smaller space than the others. I put faces to those I was told to fish with, with those I just loved to fish with and had shared with others…and then I said to myself; yes. Yes, I want to keep doing this, but I cannot continue to make it something it is not. I just have to put the soul back in it.
I mean I could easily fish with the people I like to fish with day after day, but there is just something about being in the tournaments that I wasn’t ready to give up. I didn’t want to stop meeting new people and learning new things about the behavior of bass (and people). I wasn’t ready to give that up.
And in that moment I decided to get back to fishing. Ok, I was even going to do it in a tournament setting, but just fishing. Simpler bait choices, simpler strategies; familiar and fun. No more trying to learn every technique, to do what others do; no more complicating it. Just fishing with all of my friends, while fishing how I like to fish.
And I did.
I kept the same 1/0 EWG Gamakatsu hook I always choose, the 8lb test Berkley Trilene I had used since I was 20 (well, new boxes of it and occasionally 10lb) on my favorite spinning reels – or a 2/0 EWG Bass Pro jig head if I didn’t fish a senko or ribbit frog. And I fished with spinning reels most of the time…even with a frog.
For the spinning baits or buzz baits (or in heavy grass for senkos), I used bait casters with 10-15lb Spider Wire in the red box.
Most of my good days included my favorite bait, senko; I only carried four colors 99% of the time where I used to have ten or more. The other baits I used were those I had learned fishing farm ponds years ago, or had learned to absolutely enjoy fishing; spinner bait tipped with a chartreuse tail, zara spook, skitter pop, swim dinger, buzz bait, ribbit toads…
…about all I threw this year and fished with a consistency I hadn’t found in a looooonnnngg time.
And by making simpler choices…and understanding my purpose for fishing; just enjoying it for the first time in a while…I won CAKFG angler of the year and placed seventh in the Tennessee Bass Nation Kayak Series. But even more importantly to me, I made some new friends and shared the water with good folks.
And while I am at it, I want to give a big thanks to all of the people who make these events possible.
I have even considered, maybe, going to some of the larger events again….we will see. I do know that I will not lose myself doing something I love again.
Topwater Moon 